Twin Flame or Soulmate? A Love Story

“Once upon a time, there was a girl and a boy…a lot of stuff happened…and they lived happily ever after. Now you know the story of how I met my husband! 😃

Okay, okay…there’s a lot more to it than that, but it really did start with “a girl and a boy…”

I met him in grade school. He was a year older than me, which means we were never in a classroom, hallway or even a playground together at the same time. Back then, classes were kept separate from each other…sixth graders stayed with the sixth graders, seventh graders with the seventh graders, etc. That’s where we were…a sixth grader (me) and a seventh grader (him).

It was just a random day, nothing really special about it. I was at recess minding my own business on the swings with the other 11-year-olds when a very pretty and popular seventh grade girl crossed the boundary of their playground, walked straight up to me and said, “Kirk Considine wants you to go with him.” I knew who she was—all the girls in my class knew who Brandy was…cheerleader, perfect hair, perfect teeth, designer clothes…the girl we all wished we could be. I didn’t know who he was, though, and that’s the super-cool response I had, “Who’s Kirk Considine?”

“Oh, he’s sooooo cute! You should say yes!” So I did. To be fair, she could have asked me if I wanted my face punched and I would have said yes. No popular kids ever talked to me! Even though I’d read Stephen King’s Carrie and assumed this was part of some cruel prank, I was still giddy when I went back inside for English class. Not only did Brandy talk to me, but some older boy I didn’t know wanted me to be his girlfriend! I asked everyone if they knew Kirk, and most did. “Oh, he’s that really good basketball player”…”Do you mean the tall kid with the mustache?”…”I think he’s the captain of the Scholastic Bowl team.”

Each revelation about Kirk made my heart sink a little. I hadn’t even met him yet, but I already knew he was handsome, smart, athletic, popular…definitely “too good” for me. Crap…it was a prank. Because why would someone like that be interested in someone like me? I barely spoke a word out loud and 90% of my wardrobe was made up of old t-shirts and bib overalls. That fuzzy little ball of happiness in my heart deflated and sank like a stone into my stomach by the time class ended.

It wasn’t a prank though. He was serious, and I knew it the second I officially met him and looked into his baby blue eyes. Oh sure, he was extremely cute and very tall, but it was more than that. He was a magnet, and I was steel (…and all the other girls were plastic!). I’d never felt such a level of comfort before. Being with him felt so right, so safe, so….familiar. Pretty sophisticated emotions for an 11-year-old, but it’s not as though I truly understood all those complexities. All I knew was that I was made for him, and he was made for me.

We spent many nights on the phone, talking about all kinds of pointless things. On weekends and over the summer, we would walk all over town together and often ended up at my favorite place…the cemetery. All that solitude, the deep forest behind it, the scenic view of the lake, those weathered tombstones…it was very peaceful. It was here that Kirk first told me he loved me and that he was going to marry me. It was so beautiful and perfect….and, alas…fleeting.

At the end of his eighth grade year (my seventh) his family moved to California…2,000 miles away from where I was in Illinois. Devastation doesn’t begin to cover how I felt when I found out he was leaving. I was never going to see him again! My one true love was being taken from me in the name of Better Paying Jobs Out West. Our parents wouldn’t allow us to make long-distance phone calls. All we could do to keep in touch was write each other letters, which we did…for a while.

And then…a lot of stuff happened.

We grew up….went to college, married and divorced other people, started families, found careers, etc. But I never stopped thinking about him, never stopped feeling a deep, yearning love for him. Anyone I ever met had to listen to me talk about him. I’d usually get responses like, “You haven’t spoken to him in all these years but you love him? That’s the dumbest thing I’ve ever heard.” It didn’t shake my resolve, though. I needed him, I knew that in the depths of my heart, but I also “knew” he didn’t even remember me. What a fool I was!

Sixteen years after I had to say goodbye to Kirk, I had to say another goodbye…to my father. It was a brain aneurysm that took him away. No one saw it coming. It was very sudden, and there was nothing we could do but grieve. But then…a miracle! As I was treading water in  an ocean of tears, a life preserver landed next to me. It was Leslie, my younger sister’s BFF since birth, who tossed it to me…Leslie, who was dating Kirk’s older brother. “Teresa! OMG! Did you know Kirk was in Illinois last month looking for a job? He’s moving back here!” She even brought me a recent picture of him…my God…he looked just as I remembered him! His eyes still the same crystal blue that pierced my heart so many years ago. “Here’s his email address. You should write him!”

Hard to believe that someone as wordy as me would have trouble finding the words for that first message! Write, rewrite, delete, write, edit, delete, delete, rewrite, delete…UGH! I didn’t know what to say or how to sound, so I settled on a “professional” tone and kept it short. Guess what happened? He emailed me back right away…”Of course I remember you! Are you kidding? I’ve ALWAYS loved you!”

😵 😵 😵 😵 W H A T ? ! ? ! ? ! 😵 😵 😵 😵

Not once did I entertain the notion that he would feel the same way I did. A couple months later, he was heading to Illinois with everything packed into a UHaul. We moved in together immediately and married a little over a year later.

Now, don’t get me wrong…the years between our reunion and today have not all been happy and filled with unicorns and rainbows. There were times we didn’t think we would be able to surmount all the troubles that such a whirlwind relationship had brought. We fought, we struggled, we cried…but we never gave up.

I always believed that he and I were soulmates, till I learned about Twin Flames. I was reading an article on the subject (Top 20 Twin Flame Signs) and thinking about the last 35 years that I’ve loved this man. On pretty much every point, I found myself saying “Oh, that’s why!” We had to grow apart and  experience life separately before we could reunite and experience life together. It’s the way we designed it, as part of our Soul Agreement. The love we feel for each other is eternal and unbreakable, but…it’s always felt that way. It’s just that now, we get to truly live in that love each day rather than fantasize about “one day.” In August, we will be celebrating our 15th wedding anniversary!

I asked him once, “Why me? Why did you pick me over all those pretty girls?” He said, “I don’t know. You just really…stood out to me.”

And then….they lived happily ever after. 💗👫💗